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 Shikyo Teisei

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Belphegor Zagiel
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PostSubject: Shikyo Teisei   Wed Jul 22, 2009 9:25 pm

Name: Shikyo Teisei (Death Scream)

Manifestation:


Release Phrase: Deafen them with your scream, Shikyo Teisei

Level: Bankai

Family: Sound

Sealed Zanpacktou: It’s like a regular katana with two tiny bells at the end of the hilt


Released Zanpacktou: The two tiny bells remain at the end of the hilt


Shikai Ability: In this state the blade transforms into pure spiritual energy which flows at super speed creating supersonic sound waves that sounds like a humming which can be manipulated by the user increasing or decreasing the intensity of the pitch and the force of the sound waves it makes. It also due to the super speed it can cut most materials(ice, metal, wood, rocks, etc) but not a zanpaktou which is in the same level, this works like a chainsaw.


Bankai zanpacktou: Still there are the two tiny bells at the end



Bankai Ability: The Zanpaktou has transformed into a scythe, the blade also transform like the shikai, but now the sound waves produced by the blade are faster so the sound is louder, also now has the property to change the physical state of matter at a molecular level by manipulating its composition with the sound and vibration the zan produces, making a material softer or harder or simply destroys it.

Techniques:

Name: Insanity Bell (Shikai)
Effect: There are tiny bell at the end of the zan’s hilt, these bells only produce sound at the command of the owner, the sound produced by this bells will later got into the middle and inner ear of the opponent. It takes 1 post to take full efect in that period this tech can be avoided by destroying the tiny bells at the end of the hilt of the zan. This sound mess with the ears causing a loss of balance, confusion, and eventually psychoticness, at the beginning the sound will just be annoying but then it causes the opponent to see hallucinations and enter a paranoia state, this last 2 posts. If the opponent is too far away (100 meters), the bell sound will not affect him.
Cooldown: 3 posts cooldown

Name: Sound Bending (Shikai)
Effect: The zan shoots a sonic boom with a 10 meter radius, and the enemy gets thrown due to the massive, sudden pressure from the attack. It's linear to the direction of the blade, the direction however can be controlled by the owner by moving his hands and the sonic boom can be divided 3 times but weaker than the original.

Sound Bending can also be used to repel an attack on impact. Like, when blocking a blow from another sword, I can use the tech to make a sonic boom explosion, combined with timed counter swing to minimize the recoil of the blade, to give some force in an opposite direction of the incoming blow, thus repel the incoming blow, this is just works to diminish the strenght of the attack not completely avoiding it. Cooldown: 3 posts

Name: Resounding enviroment (Bankai)
Effect: At the command of the owner a giant box begin to form,It takes one post to take full effect and in that period the tech can avoided by the release of a reiatsu bigger than the owner's one. After that period both the opponent and the owner are trapped in a giant box, the box is transparent but nobody can see what is happening inside it, in the box interior the battlefield doesn’t change. The effect is that every attack made by the owner is enhanced; making its destructive power much bigger, a normal attack is multiplied almost by 5, if the owner uses a Shikai tech it’ll multiply by 2.5.
The duration of the box is limited, if the owner performs a Shikai tech 3 times, the box will automatically destroy.The box cannot be formed if there is too much distance between the enemy and the owner (50 meters). The walls of the box can be destroyed before the final duration by releasing a bigger reiatsu than the owner current reiatsu during the stance of the enemy on the box.
Cooldown: 15 posts/ 5 post Duration


Last edited by Belphegor Zagiel on Sat Aug 01, 2009 6:33 pm; edited 9 times in total
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Shinzui Debiru
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PostSubject: Re: Shikyo Teisei   Wed Jul 22, 2009 9:38 pm

don't godmode with it being able to cut through every existing material. it cant cut through another zanpacktou thats at your level

for insanity bell, add a duration of how long the opponent will see hallucinations and the paranoia state
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Shinzui Debiru
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PostSubject: Re: Shikyo Teisei   Wed Jul 22, 2009 9:58 pm

approved
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Chomatsu
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PostSubject: Re: Shikyo Teisei   Thu Jul 23, 2009 1:04 am

Name: Insanity Bell (Shikai)
Effect: There are tiny bell at the end of the zan’s hilt, these bells only produce sound at the command of the owner, the sound produced by this bells got into directly the middle and inner ear of the opponent, this sound mess with the ears causing a loss of balance, confusion, and eventually psychoticness, at the beginning the sound will just be annoying but then it causes the opponent to see hallucinations and enter a paranoia state, this last 2 posts.
Cooldown: 3 posts cooldown

Insanity Bell is an auto hit, you must rework this by giving it some sort of conditions for success.

Name: Sound Bending (Shikai)
Effect: The zan shoots a sonic boom, and the enemy gets thrown due to the massive, sudden pressure from the attack. It's linear to the direction of the blade, the direction however can be controlled by the owner by moving his hands and the sonic boom can be divided into many others but weaker than the original.

Sound Bending can also be used to repel an attack on impact. Like, when blocking a blow from another sword, I can use the tech to make a sonic boom explosion, combined with timed counter swing to minimize the recoil of the blade, to give some force in an opposite direction of the incoming blow, thus repel the incoming blow. Ultimately it can create a sound sphere around the owner preventing any attacks
Cooldown: 3 posts

Give a radius for the sonic boom and state how many times the sonic boom can be divided. Also for the repel thing, its a little OP, it cant just repel any attack, that is unreasonable. I can allow it to give you a minor defensive cushion against impacts, thats the only thing that seems to be fair.

Name: Resounding enviroment (Bankai)
Effect: At the command of the owner both the opponent and the owner are trapped in a giant box, the box is transparent but nobody can see what is happening inside it, in the box interior the battlefield doesn’t change. The effect is that every attack made by the owner is enhanced; making its destructive power much bigger, a normal attack is multiplied by 5, if the owner uses a Shikai tech it’ll multiply by 2.5.
The duration of the box is limited, if the owner performs a Shikai tech 3 times, the box will automatically destroy.
Cooldown: 15 posts/ 5 post Duration

Your bankai is good, though automatically trapping an opponent is flirting with the auto hit law again. Again just make conditions for the boxes trapping success, but other wise nice job.

Bankai Ability: The Zanpaktou has transformed into a scythe, the blade also transform like the shikai, but now the sound waves produced by the blade are faster so the sound is louder, also now has the property to change the physical state of matter at a molecular level by manipulating its composition with the sound and vibration the zan produces, making a material softer or harder or simply destroys it.

I wont put any more restictions, I will just request that you do not god mod with the your bankai ability to manipulate density, make sure you are REASONABLE.
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Belphegor Zagiel
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PostSubject: Re: Shikyo Teisei   Thu Jul 23, 2009 3:00 am

Edited
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Chomatsu
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PostSubject: Re: Shikyo Teisei   Thu Jul 23, 2009 3:39 am

Name: Insanity Bell (Shikai)
Effect: There are tiny bell at the end of the zan’s hilt, these bells only produce sound at the command of the owner, the sound produced by this bells got into directly the middle and inner ear of the opponent, this sound mess with the ears causing a loss of balance, confusion, and eventually psychoticness, at the beginning the sound will just be annoying but then it causes the opponent to see hallucinations and enter a paranoia state, this last 2 posts. If the opponent is too far away (200 yards), the bell sound will not affect him
Cooldown: 3 posts cooldown

You need to change this for it is still an auto hit, its nice that you've added a radius but it still has an auto effect on enemies, you need to either re work the entire technique or make is so that there is way to avoid and or defend against it.

Sound Bending can also be used to repel an attack on impact. Like, when blocking a blow from another sword, I can use the tech to make a sonic boom explosion, combined with timed counter swing to minimize the recoil of the blade, to give some force in an opposite direction of the incoming blow, thus repel the incoming blow. Ultimately it can create a sound sphere around the owner preventing any attacks

You have not changed this part of sound bending at all like I advised, please edit this to as i stated previously.

Name: Resounding enviroment (Bankai)
Effect: At the command of the owner both the opponent and the owner are trapped in a giant box, the box is transparent but nobody can see what is happening inside it, in the box interior the battlefield doesn’t change. The effect is that every attack made by the owner is enhanced; making its destructive power much bigger, a normal attack is multiplied by 5, if the owner uses a Shikai tech it’ll multiply by 2.5. The box cannot be formed if there is too much distance between the enemy and the owner (100 yards)
The duration of the box is limited, if the owner performs a Shikai tech 3 times, the box will automatically destroy.
Cooldown: 15 posts/ 5 post Duration

Again you have added a radius but just like insanity bell this is still an auto hit or in this case an auto trap. Just because you activate this technique does not mean that your opponent automatically gets trapped in a box environment along with you. So make the needed corrections as stated previously
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Belphegor Zagiel
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PostSubject: Re: Shikyo Teisei   Thu Jul 23, 2009 3:56 am

Fixed
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Shiroma Kogetsu
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PostSubject: Re: Shikyo Teisei   Thu Jul 23, 2009 10:31 am

Name: Resounding enviroment (Bankai)
Effect: At the command of the owner both the opponent and the owner are trapped in a giant box, the box is transparent but nobody can see what is happening inside it, in the box interior the battlefield doesn’t change. The effect is that every attack made by the owner is enhanced; making its destructive power much bigger, a normal attack is multiplied by 5, if the owner uses a Shikai tech it’ll multiply by 2.5.
The duration of the box is limited, if the owner performs a Shikai tech 3 times, the box will automatically destroy.The box cannot be formed if there is too much distance between the enemy and the owner (100 yards). The walls of the box can be destroyed before the final duration by releasing a bigger reiatsu than the owner current reiatsu during the stance of the enemy on the box.
Cooldown: 15 posts/ 5 post Duration

This technique still seems to be slighty auto-hit regarding the distance needed to avoid the attack, but it's good knowing it can be stopped after activation.
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Belphegor Zagiel
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PostSubject: Re: Shikyo Teisei   Thu Jul 23, 2009 5:39 pm

Fixed..
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Espina
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PostSubject: Re: Shikyo Teisei   Thu Jul 23, 2009 10:12 pm

Hrm. I vote for approval, But because of the fact that this has been a hot topic, You gotta get another mod's approval too.
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Yaouchi
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PostSubject: Re: Shikyo Teisei   Thu Jul 23, 2009 10:21 pm

Quote :
the box is transparent but nobody can see what is happening inside it,
then its not really transparent. EDIT

Quote :
a normal attack is multiplied by 5, if the owner uses a Shikai tech it’ll multiply by 2.5.
eh im tempted to make you change it but I wont. Just say that id rather it be smaller than 5 on the normal but I wont force you to.

Quote :
The box cannot be formed if there is too much distance between the enemy and the owner (100 yards).
your saying its got a 99 yard distance. Either that or your to vague. But I would not approve 100 yards range.

One more thing from insanity bell.
Quote :
If the opponent is too far away (200 yards), the bell sound will not affect him
Cut the 200 yards down. Thats like a whole battlefield away.

Otherwise its all good.

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~Drink Master Yaouchi Of the Superhumans~
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Belphegor Zagiel
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PostSubject: Re: Shikyo Teisei   Thu Jul 23, 2009 10:35 pm

Fixed
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Shiroma Kogetsu
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PostSubject: Re: Shikyo Teisei   Thu Jul 23, 2009 11:23 pm

They're complaning about the range of your Insanity Bell, so I think you should fix it. The insanity bell tech. that you have is a auto-hit because it has massive range and the way to stop it is close near impossible to do. Your opponents won't be able to exactly destroy the bell because you can still dodge their attacks.
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Belphegor Zagiel
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PostSubject: Re: Shikyo Teisei   Fri Jul 24, 2009 12:51 am

I have already fixed it according to Yao's advice...
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Yaouchi
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PostSubject: Re: Shikyo Teisei   Fri Jul 24, 2009 3:14 am

Shiroma I believe it would be possible to escape the bell if you were only exposed for 1 post.

I will agree with Espina now and say Approved.

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Chomatsu
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PostSubject: Re: Shikyo Teisei   Sat Aug 01, 2009 12:46 am

Basically here is my concern on your techniques. First off insanity bell.

Name: Insanity Bell (Shikai)
Effect: There are tiny bell at the end of the zan’s hilt, these bells only produce sound at the command of the owner, the sound produced by this bells got into directly the middle and inner ear of the opponent,

The part that is underlined is my prime concern. Upon activation of this technique you are saying that your opponent is being directly effected. This is an auto hit. In my opinion the nature of this technique is seemingly going to lead down the road of auto hit regardless. My advice would be to just create a whole new tech. Sound is a delicate attribute and can often teeter on the fine line of legal and illegal as far as rp is concerned.

Name: Resounding enviroment (Bankai)
Effect: At the command of the owner both the opponent and the owner are trapped in a giant box,

Resounding evironment, the part that is underlined is where my concern lies. Upon activating this technique you are stating that you automatically trap yourself along with your opponent in a box. Auto Hit. You will have to figure something out because that is unreasonable. Just because you activate a bankai technique does not mean anyone is automatically subject to it.

Other than this I have no further objections.
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Belphegor Zagiel
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PostSubject: Re: Shikyo Teisei   Sat Aug 01, 2009 3:44 am

I understand your concern and you are correct in the underlined part and i maybe should have change those sentences but later i explain that in both cases, the bell and the box techniques take 1 post to make effect so the opponents have the oportunity to avoid my attack, also i provide the way to stop both techs, yaouchi already saw this changes and i took his advice , then he approve my zan, i dont know if you saw this part. If you have any more doubts tell me.
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Chomatsu
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PostSubject: Re: Shikyo Teisei   Sat Aug 01, 2009 9:13 am

I dont have any doubts, I know Yaouichi is a good mod. However when you get things to correct concerning your techniques do not just add to them. Read over your technique(s) and eliminate aspects that have been ruled illegal so that there is no confusion and contradiction. So you may need to do some rewording, since everything has been ironed out concerning your techniques all you need to do is make them as clear and concise as possible so that if there is ever any reference to your creations there will be no arguments or confusions.
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Belphegor Zagiel
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PostSubject: Re: Shikyo Teisei   Sat Aug 01, 2009 6:35 pm

You are correct in your observation, its now fixed....^^
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PostSubject: Re: Shikyo Teisei   Sat Aug 01, 2009 8:12 pm

Now we are in business Very Happy

You have Chomatsu the Super Modz Approval!
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